Preschool Education

If you’ve just sent a child to kindergarten this year you probably know how difficult a decision it can be. Is your son or daughter ready? Will she be the youngest in the class? So many factors to consider. Many schools have mandatory cut-off dates, based on your child’s birthday, which makes the decision so much easier.

According to a recent article in the New York Times, apparently parents are using a wide range of factors for making the decision. Reasons cited ranged from being tall enough to play high school sports to emotional maturity. The story’s title even contains the word “Redshirting” which is the practice of holding a high school athlete back for the sake of competitive sports.  It never dawned on me to think about high school sports! But, it’s a new world.

Kindergarten is not the same experience of my childhood or even my children’s time, 20-some years ago. We’ve become so competitive in today’s society that even this earliest of school experiences is fraught with competition and the need to excel. Five year olds are expected to be competitive and possess significant skills upon entering school. It’s hard to imagine a kindergarten teacher telling a parent that his child lacks the necessary math skills… isn’t that what they’re coming to school to learn? The term “early education” has changed to include infants, we are trying to educate our children at a much earlier age than in any other time in recent history. Is that a good thing?

So, how do we decide if a 5 year old is ready to enter kindergarten? Is is based on emotional maturity? Or is it more important that they be as tall as the others in the class? Someone will always be the shortest and the youngest. There are so many factors to consider, and putting a child in school before he’s ready can be traumatic if it means later having to repeat a school year.

It’s not an absolute science. We all mature at different rates, what works for one child with an August birthday may not work for another with the exact same date. Factors like shyness, size, fine motor skills all come into play.

I’m not sure why we have arrived at a place where children are pushed to excel at such an early age? What’s the rush? They’ve got years and years to achieve. I’m in favor of keeping children children. Having fun, exploring, playing and getting to know themselves without all the pressure.

What do you think? Is this a decision you’ve had to grapple with?

Some of the new iPhone apps for children can be used  to promote learning as well as providing a diversion when taking children out to a restaurant. Many restaurants provide crayons and an activity sheet, but that may not be enough to keep the little ones entertained through the whole meal. It would be easy enough to pack a few items in the diaper bag for your child, maybe a favorite book or their favorite toy.  You want to plan for activities to keep children content as they wait for their meals, but it’s also important to teach children how to behave when eating out.  Learning to handle being out with mom and dad can be fun and is to be encouraged. And, I’m not sure if we’re teaching that if all we’re doing is pacifying children or distracting them with novel treats?

I recently read an article about  iPhone and iPad apps for children, which promoted applications for young children as a way of distracting  children during a meal. Let me say that I’m not in keen on the idea of giving the kids an iPhone to play with at dinner, I see problems coming when children decide that mommy’s iPhone is for their usage at all times of the day.

Honestly, I’m not totally in favor of promoting too much technology with very young children, but some of these apps are pretty neat. And, I actually see one I want to play with for myself. But the first two? Not very appropriate, says this grandmother.  The first one is called Bubble Pop, it’s a game consisting of bubble wrap, which makes popping sounds when you touch the bubbles on the screen. Period.  I don’t want to be in the booth behind a 3 year old who sits there popping bubble wrap on his mommy’s iPhone the whole time I’m eating dinner. Do you?

The second one is called Scoops.  “Is there anything better than ice cream? How about ice cream that doesn’t leave a sticky mess?  This game of towering ice cream scoops lets you tilt your screen left or right to keep the ice cream from falling. Avoid the veggies and stack similar colors together for bonus points. “ Sure bet that junior avoids his veggies and begs for ice cream? Cute idea, but….

To be fair, there are some great apps there with educational value. Shape Builder, which is like Tetris for kids, First Word Animals, a drag and drop spelling game that allow you to name the featured animal, and Brushes, which is described as similar to Adobe Photoshop. That’s the one I want.

I know we live in a more technologically advanced age now and in a number of years we’ll do everything by computer or smart phone. I have an iPhone and am pretty attached to it. But, I’m an adult. And maybe my grandma stuff is showing here? I want my grandchildren to learn how to behave, because it’s what they need to do. The world is full of challenges and as adults we have to learn to wait and sit quietly sometimes.  Hmmm… when I wait, I play Solitaire, on my iPhone!  This might be one of those ‘do as I say, not as I do‘ moments.

What do you think? Kids in restaurants, young kids with iPhones?

photo from buzz.bishop @ Flickr.com

Nollie Infant Car Seat Cover

Car seat covers are just one of those things you really can’t go without. Earlier in the summer I talked about some of our favorite car seat covers, and why you might consider replacing your current seats.

We now have reduced prices on many of our infant and toddler car seat covers. They’re great deals and you’ll find a wide variety of styles and colors, perfect for your little one.

The Itzy Ritzy Hollywood Toddler car seat covers are reversible with hidden velcro openings so it can be simply installed without undoing any straps. It ’s made to fit over the original cover for ease in installation. This cute Social Circle Blue reverses to a chocolate dot pattern.

On the Little Butterfly Kiss website you’ll find dozens of car seat covers in various colors and patterns. Take a look and check out our great prices.

Snacks!  Kids would eat all day if you let them, but they might not choose the most nutritious kinds of foods. The key is to find snacks that are good for your children without too many ‘empty’ calories.

Cheese is a wonderful food that most children like, you can buy cubed cheese or string cheese. The string cheese is fun; everyone loves pulling off the individual pieces to eat and it comes in low-fat varieties. Cubed cheese can be bought in snack packs making it a ideal choice for a quick pick-me-up. Let your child count out the pieces of cheese as you put it on the the plate.

Vegetables! Getting the required number of servings every day (5 servings of fruit and vegetables) can be a challenge. Cut carrots in ‘coins’ and pretend they’re pennies , or fix stacks using rounds of carrots and cucumbers. Make little mini-pizzas or a face with two carrots for eyes, a raisin nose, and smiling mouth of a green pepper slice. Add a few other vegetables to the plate and let them get creative.

If you want to add protein, buy sliced luncheon meat and cut it into shapes with small cookie cutters. Peanut butter on apple slices is also a good way to add protein.

The key to providing variety and nutrition for your children is to get them excited about snack time.  If you can take a few minutes to sit down with your children during this period you’ll have the opportunity to learn about their day and chat with them about all the exciting things in their lives. It’s a good bonding experience for you all.

What snacks do your children like?

The arrival of a new baby brings big changes to a couple’s sex life, in ways they may not have imagined. There are a number of factors which influence a new mother’s level of desire as well as her interest in having sex.

BabyTalk, a website associated with Parenting.com conducted a survey of almost 10,000 of their readers, 96% female, about their post-partum sex lives. And, what they found is probably not news to you.

Couples who enjoyed an active sex life before the arrival of a baby experienced dramatic changes after the birth of their new child. When before 66% of women surveyed enjoyed sex more than once a week, less than 24% of couples with a baby had sex more than once a week. The article doesn’t break the numbers down further, so it’s hard to know if these numbers increase 2, 4, or 8 months after the birth of a child.

The average wait for resuming sex after giving birth is around 6 weeks, according to doctors; it may be longer before you actually feel like resuming sexual activity. Husbands will normally report more of a desire to have sex soon after childbirth, understandably so, as their bodies have not been subject to the rigors of birth.

There are a number of factors contributing to a lack of sexual desire. Sleep deprivation comes at the top of the list. New mothers are tired, feeding sporadically through the night, constantly attending to the needs of a new infant and experiencing the emotional and hormonal changes that come with childbirth. Breastfeeding mothers are less likely to resume sexual activity as quickly as mothers who use bottles. That could be attributed to the hormonal factors of breastfeeding, or the psychological changes inherent in the ‘breast’ becoming a vehicle for feeding and no longer a sexy body part. It’s difficult to relax if you think milk will come spurting out during the middle of sex.

Even in today’s environment where men are very involved with babies and spend time providing care for their newborns, it’s still a mother-child thing and moms of infants may feel closer to the new baby than to their husbands. Dads begin to feel estranged and without conversation tension arises.

So, what to do?

• Understand that the changes in a relationship are to be expected with the arrival of your first child.  Accept that fact and talk to each other about how you feel about the changes.
• Schedule  together time, without the baby. Whether it’s planning a special at-home dinner or a late night movie when the baby is asleep or, even better, getting a babysitter and going out for a few hours. You need that time for just the two of you.
• Talk about sex. Plan it. You might plan a sensuous activity that need not culminate in sexual intercourse. She may not be ready for the full experience, but a massage, or other pleasurable activity could be satisfying for both of you.
• Take a look at your bedroom, is it the baby headquarters? Are you keeping the baby in the room with you? If your room has become a nursery or staging area, it’s hard to have sexy thoughts. Consider moving a sleeping baby into another room for a few hours.

If you find that these ideas are not working, or attempts at sexual intercourse are painful, then it’s time to talk to the ob-gyn. She will be able to rule out physical issues and offer suggestions as well. Accept that the return to a romantic relationship will be slow going, but be sensitive to possible continuing issues.

How did you cope with changes to your relationship?